This is an intimate study of the dynamics of a New York City family in the late 19th century. Clarence Day, Jr., the eldest of three boys, writes descriptively and honestly about his parents, especially the control of his father-his word is law and that is it. However, his mother Vinnie is not a meek and retiring wife; she simply knows how things must be done in the house. She is not cowed or intimidated by Clarence’s insistence on things done his way or his verbal explosions when an unforeseen event threatens the sanctity of his well-oiled machine…I mean home!
The tensions, the joys, the mishaps and the victories of each family member reflect the professional class of which the Days are firmly a part. One of the fascinating aspects of this memoir is the detail of daily life in New York City as well as a peek into the historical events undertaken by the family such as, dining in the restaurant of the newly opened Waldorf Astoria, the special feeling a lunch at Delmonico’s brought to young Day when out with his father, an excursion to Washington Irving’s house and Sleepy Hollow, a trip to Buffalo Bill’s Wild West Show and a discussion of Henry Ward Beecher.
While it is easy for eyebrows to raise while reading of one more negative outburst from Clarence senior when something doesn’t go his way, the author makes an astute observation when, as an older boy, he has visited the homes of many of his friends. He describes his shock and discomfort at the sullen or silent reaction fathers give to their wives and children when things go awry in their house or the constant criticism of a husband toward his wife. He understands that though he grew up with a loud, emotive, stern father he was never cruel and never sadistic as he found in the homes of his friends. He may have thought he ruled with an iron fist, but it was only in his mind. He was genuinely loved by his family who saw through the big bully to see the vulnerability and the comedy in everyday life.
Highly recommended for history buffs and classic literature lovers for its realism of 1880s/90s New York. First published as stories in the The New Yorker Magazine then published in book form in 1935. On November 8, 1939, it opened as a play on Broadway.
Personal Note
I’ve heard about the play, Life with Father, all of my life, because it featured in the early courtship of my parents. They met in their high school drama department and both were in this play with my dad in the lead role. The cast party was legendary and lasted longer than expected, which did not make my grandfather any too happy with my dad, as he yanked my mom into the house without a word to him when he drove her home.
It’s hard to imagine my father playing such an overbearing and authoritative character, but apparently he got great reviews in the local press and there was always a little twinkle in his eye when he talked about the play and how much he enjoyed it.
My Edition
Title: Life with Father
Author: Clarence Day, Jr.
Publisher: The Sun Dial Press
Device: Hardcover
Year: 1935, 1947
Pages: 258
Relevant Obscurity 
Love that story about your parents! it would be a perfect one for Reading the Theatre too, great idea.
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It’s pretty sweet, I have to admit! I’ll make a note of the play and we’ll see where I am in the Spring.
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What a fun Spin read for you! I enjoyed Life With Father quite a bit when I read it a few years ago, and I sometimes think of the reaction they had to getting a telephone installed in the house….
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Oh my gosh, that section reminded me of a Saturday Night Live Skit with Father trying to figure out who is the person on the phone!
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I’m going to add this to my TBR. I’ve seen the older movie adaptation starring Irene Dunne but at the time didn’t realize it was based off a memoir book. It would be fun to read the memoir then watch the movie again!
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Hi Karen. I’ve seen that film, too, but there is a lot in it that is not in the book. And now that I read the book, I wonder if the screen writers took more from the stories in the New Yorker or just made up scenes? If you recall the running part in the film about Father being baptized? That wasn’t in the book. But now I’m curious about what is in the play!
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I do remember that scene in the movie. I’m not surprised they changed some things in the movie. They tend to do that with movies. I’m looking forward to reading the book so I can see the comparison. 🙂
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Now YOU have me wanting to watch the movie again which I just discovered is on Amazon Prime. Welp, weekends are for movies!
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How lovely to have that connection! Ha, I suspect there were lots of fathers who thought they were the masters in their houses while their wives and kids humoured them!
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I agree, but seriously, I don’t think I could have good humored myself out of this particular house, Yikes!
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With such personal connections I’m not surprised the reading of this, from I presume a near contemporary copy, means so much to you! This sounds fascinating in itself and in its function as historical testimony – when was the high school production, and how old were your parents when they performed in it? And I wonder if the memoir has been reissued more recently?
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My parent’s production was around 1950/51 and they were 16 and 18-dad older. And now, on to the play! Maybe I’ll save it for Lory’s Reading the theater.
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